Get Real: Are you attracting what you want?

Do you know what you really want and how to get it? This week we’re getting real about the Law of Attraction (which was around long before The Secret came out).

Quick definition: “I attract to my life whatever I give my attention, energy, and focus to, whether positive or negative.”binoculars_blondewoman

It’s pretty no-nonsense, basic stuff. Got it: whatever you put your attention to grows. If it’s drama in your life, guess what? More drama. If it’s working toward a goal, well, lookie there, you reached it! If you are focusing on the wrong thing or too many things, then we may not see those gifts as quickly.

LOA is not about sitting and wishing and hoping but the more clear and defined about what we want, the better. Then we act on it.

I would have NEVER finished a novel if I didn’t put my attention, energy and focus into them. Or finding the right house or any of the other things I’ve obtained.

BUT IT’S MORE THAN GOAL SETTING. It’s a push/pull, see-saw type of thing between you and Universe which is what I think is way cool about it.

I like to think of it as the energy of the Universe in play for you. You send out signs with your intentions and actions and the Universe conspires to make those things happen. Yes, it does seem like they are “appearing” for you, much like signs, but the truth is we may just be becoming AWARE of them because our eyes are opened and we’ve put that thing/person/goal at the forefront. It’s making invisible connections when we don’t even realize it.

WE’RE OPEN TO THEM, NOT CLOSED OFF. We can be our own worst enemies on keeping great things away from us. Which is sad, isn’t it?

I do think it’s a powerful magnet though, drawing in those things that you are seeking. It’s awesome to witness in your life. And if it’s  purpose-driven thing, a “meant to be” situation, it will happen. We don’t know WHEN, so we do have to be patient.

I’m an Aries, fire sign, ENTJ type but my zest for life could still mean I’m running past the things I should pay attention to, so if your personality is similar to mine, you may have to tell yourself to slow down and do things like daily meditation, yoga, sitting in stillness, connecting with nature and becoming a better listener so you can stay attuned to the signs along the way.

Also my anxiety and rumination has gotten in the way of the natural law of attraction because my thoughts were consumed by the wrong things and anxiety often begets anxiety. I’ve come a long way in the last six years with all of that, but I still find I have to pay attention to it and force myself back in the present moment if I’m thinking unproductively. (Good daydreams don’t count as that’s creative exercise.)

How is LOA working for me now? I started working on a new challenging book and I’ve been blown away with the generosity of my sources, but should I be? Thing is, MOST PEOPLE ARE KIND AND WANT TO HELP. That’s right. Whatever your goal is, people will rise up to help you with it, especially if you are authentic, kind and positive.

Does that mean you have to be positive “all the time” for it to work? We all have bad times but that shouldn’t define who we are. I’ve had a TON of setbacks and emotional times where I was swimming against the tide, but you don’t have to let those bad times drown you.

However, if we are negative, pessimistic and have a chip on our shoulder a lot of the time, that’s likely what we will SEE FIRST and we’ll attract MORE OF THAT. Yuck.

I’m narrowing my focus and being more careful about where my energy goes and I hope you will, too. I’d love to hear how it goes for you. Remember to pay attention to your intuition as your guide. I wrote about that last week. 

What if your goals are ego driven? Like, I want a big house, a luxury car, the lottery, a hot babe? Will the Universe give in to your “selfish” demands? I love what Deepak Chopra had to say about how LOA and the Law of Detachment work hand in hand:

The two go together as integral functions of creativity. You don’t do them simultaneously, but sequentially. First you desire, then let go. The impulse of individual desire can only be supported by the universe if we let go of our attachment and ego control and allow Nature to come in and fulfill the desire in a way which is in harmony and balance with everything else in the universe.

Look, I don’t claim to be any sort of LOA expert. I’m just here for the ride like the rest of us, but I think it’s important. It helps me keep my eye on the prize and remind myself that I am too scattered and that I’ll get more of the good stuff by being more intentional (which is why that’s the theme this year to live with intention) and do my part to make my dreams come to fruition.

I’m letting go of a lot this year. Physical, mental, emotional. It feels good and it’s scary but I do appreciate that I’m listening to what I need to hear and taking heart and taking action. I’m trusting that the Universe has my back, that I’ll have my eyes open when the signs and opportunities are there and everything with work out as was meant to be.

What do you think? Too “out there”? Can you see how LOA manifests in your life and those around you?

I do recommend vision boards and mantras to writing down your goals and key words and photos to help you keep those things you want in life top of mind and then watch how things start rocking and rolling.

Book connection:: Yes, I DID write a book with the theme of the karma and the law of attraction, set in Mexico, called LIFE’S A BEACH. It’s a fun beach read and I thoroughly enjoyed writing it years ago. It’s still my best-selling novella.

UPDATE ON MY WELLNESS GOAL #writerwellness

Two of the first posts this year were on getting real about getting up and eating healthy so it’s time for an update.  I’m sitting less thanks to the standing desk I wrote about and even eating better than I was at the start of the year. Over the last month I went from working out 2-3 times a week to something every day. So I’ve lost 14 lbs. since last summer and am thisclose to reaching my waist measurement goal. I’m not going to be paranoid about it though. At this point, it just feels great to be the same size I was when I got married in my 20s before I started having children. And actually my shape is a lot better and I’m eating way better than I did back then even though I was a vegetarian. I still ate a crapload of crap food.

I feel amazing and have a TON OF ENERGY and that’s what really matters. I’ve lost a dress size and almost two dress sizes, which I’m not entirely happy about because I really liked some of those clothes and feel bummed that they don’t fit, but it’s always a good excuse to go shopping for new ones. Baggy clothes are a big pet peeve so off to Goodwill they go.

Friends have asked what I’m eating and how I’m exercising so happy to share…

Food:

If it’s clean/green/lean, I’ll eat it. (I STILL HATE CARROTS. GAG.)  I eat turkey and chicken, but not really pork or beef. Only rarely. And even then my protein is small in portion to my veggies. And I do one or two meatless days a week.

If it’s fake food, I probably won’t eat it. (That’s about the sum of things since I don’t count calories or carbs – sounds like too much work – but I will get more specific.)

I eat every day: almonds, spinach, plain Greek yogurt, a banana, Grape Nuts with blueberries and almond milk. For lunch I make a smoothie unless I’m meeting someone for lunch and then I just pick a healthy option and ask for dressing on the side. I add natural peanut butter to my smoothie for a protein mostly because it’s easy and I always have it around. I also like boiled eggs for protein and tuna at least once a week.

 

Dr. Oz claims that if you try something 7 times you’ll acquire a taste for it. I recently did that with giving up mocha iced coffees and doing iced coffee with cream only instead. The first three times, I was like, GAG, but now I’m used to it. And weirdly enough, it still feels like a treat.

I don’t have much sugar, carbs or cheese. Yes, most things have some sugar and some carbs but abstaining from bread and potatoes isn’t that big of a deal. If I craved a french bread with butter, I’d totally dig into it, though. I’m not going to get ridiculous.

I’m not sure if that sounds radical or not, but it doesn’t feel it to me. I feel full and grab a healthy snack when I’m hungry so it’s all good. I think the key is I don’t feel that I’m depriving myself. If I wanted to splurge on something, I’d probably just rationalize that I’d work it off the next day, but I really don’t have that craving.

I’ll still drink wine occasionally, though not as often as I used to. I kind of like saving that for nights out or wine with a girlfriend. I also like a light beer every now and then.

HERE’S HOW I MOVE MOREIMG_2777

I do Zumba 2-3x a week and total body conditioning 2x a week (at Co-Motion in Edmond, OK) and yoga and pilates (blogilates.com) at home with an online instructor. I do hip hop at least once a week, which is a bit more legs and buns work than Zumba. I’ll likely join YMCA so I can have some more options like being able to use the treadmill and bike when I’m reading or brainstorming so I can sneak in a little more as well as add in some more weight training just for toning/sculpting.

I found working out only twice a week wasn’t nearly enough. The daily cardio combined with fatiguing the muscles in classes like total body conditioning is really what’s reshaping and definitely made me lose those last 5 pounds a lot faster. I really underestimated how much of a difference more cardio could make. The last 5 pounds were a total surprise but it makes sense that I was burning more than I was taking in. So, duh.

Just one little note about working out: if it doesn’t burn, if you don’t feel like jelly when you’re done, if you feel like you can make it easily through the class YOU’RE NOT WORKING OUT HARD ENOUGH. This is why I can’t work out solely on my own. I’d never push myself the way my instructors push me.

I like a good challenge and get bored easily which is why I mix up my routine so much. I’ll be adding some other things to the mix and keep you posted. I love the outdoors so when the weather is nice, I like to walk or jog trails, bike and already have planned a hiking adventure with one of my besties, Kelley.

My energy is off the charts which is the best part for me. The endorphins and adrenalin are positive additions to my life and I’m getting a IMG_2852lot more accomplished all around, with a smile. (Even though my body does hurt – mostly muscle aches – but I think, okay, it’s working.)

I do think we each have a “natural size” that’s likely right for us and that’s dependent on our body types and genetics so I’m just going with the flow. Mostly I’m just enjoying the journey.

Good luck on reaching your fitness goals and thanks for reading. Message me or leave a comment if you have any questions.

As blogilates says, TRAIN LIKE A BEAST, LOOK LIKE A BEAUTY.

xoxo

-Malena

 

 

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